Some menopause symptoms are pretty well known, like hot flashes, night sweats, and mood swings. But a survey by ThisIsMenopause of more than 2,000 women experiencing perimenopause or postmenopause highlighted just how diverse (and surprising) menopause symptoms can be.

Below are quotes from real women who responded to the survey. They shared symptoms that caught them off guard, either because they didn’t expect them or because they didn’t realize how intense or disruptive they could be. We grouped their insights into physical symptoms (those that affect the body), cognitive symptoms (thinking, focus, memory, concentration), and emotional symptoms (mood and mental well-being).

Share your thoughts.

🗳️ Which type of menopause symptoms have surprised you most?

Physical symptoms, such as hot flashes and fatigue

Cognitive symptoms, like brain fog and memory issues

Emotional symptoms, like mood swings and depression

Thanks! You've successfully submitted your vote.

Sign up to view the results!

Continue with Facebook Continue with Google

Continue with Email

By joining, you accept our Terms of Use, and acknowledge our collection, sharing, and use of your data in accordance with our Health Data and Privacy policies.

Already a member? Log In

In addition to learning from others’ experiences, we’d love for you to take the poll above and share in the comments: What surprised you most, and what helped (even a little)?

Surprising Physical Symptoms of Menopause

Many women expect hot flashes. Fewer expect how extreme and unpredictable temperature shifts can feel, or that menopause can come with symptoms that mimic injury or illness.

What Respondents Said About Surprising Physical Symptoms

“The hot flashes are very real. I didn’t know that it meant that you would sweat so bad in a matter of seconds.”

“When I experienced a frozen shoulder, I thought I had been seriously injured.”

“I wish I had known more of the symptoms, especially heart palpitations … and weight gain.”

“I wish I knew that you could have very heavy bleeding and pain and discomfort.”

It’s important to note that symptoms like heart palpitations and heavy bleeding should always be evaluated by a physician. They might be caused by health issues beyond menopause.

Surprising Cognitive Symptoms of Menopause

A common theme in these responses: No one warned me about what menopause can do to my brain. People described fogginess, forgetfulness, and trouble concentrating — sometimes in ways that affected confidence at work and at home.

What Respondents Said About Surprising Cognitive Symptoms

“I wish I had known about the brain fog.”

“Things that used to be second nature, you feel you don’t know anymore.”

“I wish I knew that my memory would go to crap. The constant misplacing things and forgetting what I did with them is frustrating.”

For some, the most surprising part wasn’t just the symptom — it was the self-doubt it created. If you’ve experienced brain fog, what did it look like for you? Forgetting words, losing your train of thought, misplacing items, struggling to focus?

Surprising Emotional Symptoms of Menopause

Yes, mood swings are “known.” But many women in this survey described the emotional effects as far more intense than expected, including anxiety, depression, and feeling unlike themselves.

What Respondents Said About Surprising Emotional Symptoms

“It’s another level of mood swings. Anxiety, stress, depression.”

“I actually had a nervous breakdown. I alienated my family and ended up suicidal.”

“I don’t feel like the same person. Honestly, I’ll be glad when this whole thing is over.”

“You feel like you don’t want to be bothered with anyone, and it’s nothing personal. It’s just how you feel. You also start feeling like you have anxiety.”

If you’re having severe mood changes, panic, or thoughts of harming yourself, you don’t have to tough it out. It’s OK to reach out for help right away. If you or someone you know needs help, you can contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988 or chatting online.

Getting Help

You don’t have to white knuckle your way through these surprising symptoms. There are treatments that can help, including menopause hormone therapy (also known as hormone replacement therapy or HRT), nonhormonal treatment options for menopause symptoms, mental health medications, and more.

If you don’t feel your healthcare provider is listening or appropriately considering how perimenopause could be affecting you, consider finding a healthcare provider who is a menopause specialist. The Menopause Society provides a tool to help you find a certified menopause practitioner in your area.

Your Turn

Take the poll above, then tell us in the comments below:

• What symptom surprised you most — physical, cognitive, or emotional?
• Was there a moment you realized, “Oh … this is menopause”?
• What helped you cope (even a small trick like a fan to cool down with, a routine change, or finally getting support)?